Pimp My Tent (Body)

This is an awesome article written by Kasia Kedzia..

There is a show in the U.S. called "Pimp My Ride." The show is about people who get a car makeover. Basically, their old, run down car gets completely redone inside and out, everything from a new engine to a pool in the trunk. Since the show started there have even been rumored spin off shows such as "Pimp My Cubical." Why do I bring this random show up since I am in a foreign country with no television? Well, it came to mind as I studied out 2 Corinthians 5 recently.

2Cor5:1-21 (NIV) 1Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. Now it is God who has made us for this very purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.

I have slept in a tent before. It is not the most comfortable thing in the world. Tents are portable, flimsy, temporary. You know, it really doesn't matter if I am in Sudan, Poland, or the U.S. everywhere I have been I've desired more, I have longed for more and known people who are unhappy, unsatisfied and not fulfilled. And although God desires to give us life to the full while we are here, He continually reminds us that this place is not our final destination. This life is just camping; it is not my home. I lost sight of that. I have been groaning and yearning and lost my perspective! I tried to 'pimp my tent'. I forget that my body will be destroyed. Heaven is my home and it waits for me.

6 Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. We live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad.

It is so easy for me to live by sight. It is easy to trust and desire someone providing for me, caring for my physical needs, nurturing me, idolizing me. But the reflection I see of myself in them is only temporary and this person too will let me down and I them. The security I feel is a temporary illusion. It is yet another way that I am trying to fill my life here, rely on self or someone else. If I strive to please God it enables me to be faithful. I tried to find fulfillment and security in other things, and it is true, at the end of the day the void is still there, the longing remains for something more. But when I put my faith in God and live by faith I am calmer, I stop grasping for other things and I am able to hope for Heaven and be so much more at peace. I am also able to find the strength to let go of my earthly desires and let God love me. I am able to share that love with others in it's purest form and not perverse it selfishly.

11Since, then, we know what it is to fear the Lord, we try to persuade men. What we are is plain to God, and I hope it is also plain to your conscience. We are not trying to commend ourselves to you again, but are giving you an opportunity to take pride in us, so that you can answer those who take pride in what is seen rather than in what is in the heart. If we are out of our minds, it is for the sake of God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you. For Christ's love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.

Even at my worst God's grace engulfs me. When I feel like He should turn his back on me and say, "Enough!", He wraps his arms around me tighter and restores my hope. When I was feeling hopeless and searching my heart and grasping to turn away from sin, He reassured me. He continues to reassure me. All of a sudden the calls and emails came and the gears started moving. I am no longer idle, but am starting to work and do things. It was really humbling as I am sure God looked down from heaven and said, "If you could have just held on another day, but even though you lost faith and turned from me I will still give you what you long for. I will restore you." To feel God's love I have to continually seek it and recognize that it is His voice calling out to my heart to not lose heart, to restore it. I have gotten to a place where I am not broken about my sin because I fear judgment; I am broken by the pain I cause Jesus. I draw strength from Him and am able to share that strength with those around me. I am lighter because my conscious is clear. I am compelled by His love.

16 So for now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

And so I spend time with my first love. I cling to Him and hope in Him, as only He can guard my heart and yet simultaneously allow me to share love (His love) with others. But this is a constant daily battle - die to self and trade human affection for God's love. There have been days this week when I have lost the battle and days I have won. This battle has raged inside of me for two weeks and it continues as I persevere to fight my way through it and seek God's wisdom and His answers. And somehow a part of me knows there is something I am still holding onto that is preventing me from fully turning back to God. I am still trying to 'Pimp My Tent'. I have accepted and seen what God's will is in my mind, but I am still fighting for my heart to surrender all.

"Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love." Revelation 2:4 (niv)